How We Found Out

July 7, 2010

*Trying very hard not to make this post TMI!*
Officially, yes, we had been trying for a couple of months. I was due to start July 4 or 5. The holiday weekend was super-busy with family in town, but when it was all said and done, I hadn’t started. I really did not think I was pregnant, for a few reasons:
1. I wanted to be. But we were praying daily for God’s will and timing for our family. I didn’t want to get my hopes up and be disappointed.
2. The month of June was a little crazy schedule-wise, so I knew that we hadn’t exactly played the numbers game to the maximum.
3. I just thought I would KNOW. I feel like I’m generally pretty in tune with my body, and I thought that if I knew it was a possibility, and had been thinking and praying on it so much, I would KNOW that there was a new life inside of me. Does everyone think that?

The ONLY reason I thought I might possibly be is because I had had a day of random cramping mid-month, which has never happened before. But it didn’t really add up calendar-wise to what we thought . . . so that could have been anything.

Tuesday on the way home from work, I stopped to buy a pregnancy test. I was a bit paranoid at this point about making sure no one I knew suspected that it was even a possibility. I carefully chose the pharmacy I stopped at, opting for the older CVS over the brand-new place that’s closer. Montgomery is small enough – and especially our area of town – that we see people we know almost everywhere. For instance, I never go to Publix that I don’t see Jill Sanderson or Ashley Wilson, two very dear friends from our Lifegroup. I purposely avoided the new Rite Aid in the Publix parking lot, thinking I was very likely to see someone there. So I walk into CVS, very alert, and who do I see but Jill. She is standing at the self-service photo center, so I duck up the aisle before she can see me. Yes, really. Make it to the family planning aisle and am immediately overwhelmed with the options. WHY are there so many? I make a quick decision – basic plus or minus, store brand (it was still $15 for crying out loud!). Pay at the pharmacy, even though it’s packed, and beat it out the door before Jill finishes.

On the way home, I thought “there are 3 tests in here. I probably won’t need 3. Wonder how long these keep?”. Checked the box – expired May 2010. It was the first week of July. At this point, I was already home, so I wasn’t going to do anything about it that night. Jason wasn’t home yet, and we had a deal that I wouldn’t take a test without him. He knew I had bought it, but I decided to give it another day. I knew I’d be sad/frustrated to get a negative (because it wouldn’t explain why I was late), so I figured I’d probably start Wednesday anyway.

Wednesday – nothing. Wednesday night I finally decided just to take one of the ones I had – figuring they were only a few weeks expired and would probably be fine. I took it, sat it on the counter in the bathroom, and went into the bedroom to wait the obligatory 2 minutes. Jason picked it up, then picked up the instructions. “Well,” I said, “what does it say?” He responded “I’m not exactly sure . . . it says that no matter how faint the line is . . .” . Sure enough, there was the faintest line possible in the plus window. But tell me – would YOU trust this result from an expired test?!? No way.

So we did what any normal people would do- threw on shoes and headed to the drugstore. Of course, by then it was about 10:15 and everything was closed, so we had to find the 24-hour pharmacy. This time, I went straight for the Clear Blue Digital! My original intent was to take the new test the next morning, so it would be super-accurate, but naturally, by the time we made it back home I had given up on waiting. New test, 3 minutes later, viola!

The first thing Jason said was “So, what do we do now?” To which I replied, “We do NOT freak out about the fact that I ate brie today!”. Which then led to an explanation of why that would even be a concern. While we were thrilled, I remember saying at one point that I felt like we were too subdued. I suppose we’re more the staring-at-each-other-in-stunned-silence type than the jump-up-and-down-screaming-type anyway.

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.”

-Ephesians 3:20-21